En Oh En Eeee            REGISTERED WGA/w NO. 639294
Run-time approximately 30 min.          Reader 1

FADE IN:

EXT. PORTLAND -- DAY

A townhouse on the River in downtown Portland, 
Oregon.

INT. TOWNHOUSE -- DAY

Nice, simple.  Tasteful stone sculpture in the 
living room.

Another room is draped in clear plastic sheeting--
the entryway, walls and floors.  In the middle of 
the room a heavy butcher block sits with a block 
of granite atop resting on sand bags.  The stone 
has a shape drawn on it.  Other rock sculptures in 
various stages of completion are on the floor.

A PERSON wearing coveralls, face shield and paper 
filter mask wheels in a steel cart.  You can't 
tell if it's a man or a woman.  The person parks 
the cart and unrolls a canvas tool wrap revealing 
a variety of chisels.  The person selects a wide 
flat chisel and hammer and approaches the granite 
block.  

The person carefully places the chisel near the 
squared edge of the block on a grease pencil line, 
holds the tool at an angle, and PING, taps it with 
the hammer.  The person continues to work the stone.

TAP PING TAP PING. 

BAM BAM BAM.  A pounding noise comes from the wall 
and startles the sculptor who was about to TAP the 
chisel.  An irritated grunt.  The sculptor 
recomposes and, PING, strikes again.

BAM BAM BAM.  A groan.  The sculptor walks to the 
wall and lifts the face shield then removes the 
filter mask.  The sculptor is NIKKI, a pretty woman 
in her 30's.  She shouts.

                 NIKKI
        We have an agreement Mister Lenke.

                 RON (O.S.)
            (sarcastic; effeminate)
        You have an agreement with Gilbert, 
        not me, Nikki.

                 NIKKI
        And it's his townhouse, Ron.  How 
        many times do we need to have this 
        argument?

Silence.  She puts her gear back on and begins 
scribing crosshatch lines with a point.  

TAP TAP TAP TAP.  From the wall BAM BAM BAM.

Groan.  TAP TAP TAP. -- BAM BAM BAM.

Growing irritation.  TAP TAP. -- BAM BAM.

TAP TAP. -- BAM BAM. 

In her anger she misaligns the point and swings 
the hammer too hard.  TAP PING CRASH.  A huge piece 
of the Stone sloughs off.  The hammer grazed her 
hand.  She glares at Lenke's wall.

                 NIKKI
        You miserable maggot!

She drops the chisel and shakes her throbbing hand.  
She lifts the face shield and filter mask.  She 
walks around the shattered stone.  The sculpture 
is ruined.  She groans.

                 NIKKI
        Nooo!

Nikki pounds the wall with her hammer.  BAM BAM 
BAM!  From the side her granite block resembles a 
giant phallus. 

                 NIKKI
        Mr. Lenke?  Ron?

                 RON (O.S.)
        Yes?

                 NIKKI
        You are a total dick. 

INT. MEXICAN RESTAURANT - PORTLAND -- DAY

Nikki and Carol, her older sister, have lunch.  
Nikki dresses in a contemporary, artsy style.

                 CAROL
        And then you stick cloves all over 
        it and put the sugar--

                 NIKKI
        --Wait.  What was that first thing.

                 CAROL
        What?

                 NIKKI
        The ham.  What did you do first?

                 CAROL
        Oh!  I excoriated it... That's my 
        new word.  I'm trying to improve my 
        vocabulary so I try to use new words 
        I hear in a sentence.

                 NIKKI
        Uh-huh... um, Carol, did you look 
        it up after you heard it?

                 CAROL
            (she scores her 
            frijoles)
        You know... excoriate.

Nikki doesn't look convinced.  Carol gets serious.

                 CAROL
        Nikki, don't go! 

                 NIKKI
        C'mon, Care.  You know how it's 
        been since I lost the gallery.  
        It's like, everything's gone wrong 
        here.  And that jerk Lenke next 
        door...

                 BOTH
            (effeminate voices)
        Ron... Uhfff.

They both do a limp wrist gesture.  Laughs. 

                 CAROL
        Nikki, we've never been apart.  I 
        don't know what I'll do without you 
        nearby.

                 NIKKI
        It isn't like you're an orphan here.  
        You have your husband and Jilly.

                 CAROL
        With Roger I'm the wife.  With Jill 
        I'm Mommy.  Jeez, half the time I'm 
        Mommy with Roger.  But when she's 
        at kindygarden and he's at work.  I 
        get to hang out with you and be 
        this wild, sexy chick.

Nikki was in mid sip with her drink.  She's caught 
off guard and laughs.  Liquid from her drink drips 
from her nose.

                 NIKKI
        Oh, that's attractive.  Thanks a 
        lot.

Carol has fun with it.  She smooths her hair and 
poses.

                 CAROL
        Sophisticated babe on the loose. 

                 NIKKI
        Hey!  Aren't you the big sister?  
            (Carol acts shamed)
        Listen, you'll be okay.  I'm stifled 
        here.  Why don't you help me move?  
        If you see the place, You'll 
        understand.

EXT. HARMONY, OREGON -- DAY

Carol drives a U-haul with a car in tow through 
the pristine rural town.  Inside with her are Nikki, 
and JILLY, 5.

                 CAROL
        It's beautiful.

                 NIKKI
            (pointing)
        Up there, go right.

Carol begins a turn just as a car pulls up from 
the other direction blocking the way.  Carol gets 
panicked.

                 CAROL
        Nikki, I can't back this thing.

The car backs up.  The teen driver smiles 
courteously and motions come.  Carol looks stunned.

                 CAROL
        Where are the road warriors?  He 
        didn't even honk.

                 NIKKI
        This ain't the big city, Sis.  They 
        don't play highway kamikaze here...  
        Told you it was nice. 

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

The U-haul pulls up to a small house.  They all 
climb out.  

                 CAROL
        This is cute, Nikki.

                 NIKKI
            (perfect contentment)
        Um-hmmm. 

                 CAROL
        Seems a little small, don't you 
        think?  Where you going to work?

                 NIKKI
        I'm going to enclose the carport 
        later.  For now, I'll work in the 
        house. 
            (Jilly tugs at her)
        What sweetie?

                 JILLY
        Can we go inside?

                 NIKKI
        In a minute.

Nikki notices the NEIGHBOR MAN rubbernecking from 
his porch.  Nikki waves.  The old man waves back--
seems stiff.  Nikki's artsy way of dressing looks 
out of place here.  Jilly latches on to Nikki's 
leg and motions her closer.

                 JILLY
            (whispers)
        Aunt Nikki, I have to go to the 
        bathroom.

                 NIKKI
        Oh, you have important business to 
        do.

Jilly grins.  Nikki takes her hand and leads her 
to the door.  Carol goes to the truck and to unhitch 
the car.  The nosey neighbor gawks.  Nikki, at the 
door, lets Jilly in.

                 NIKKI
            (waving her in)
        Carol, forget that.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

                 NIKKI
        The only other space would be the 
        dormer, and I'm not going to be 
        lugging blocks of stone up there.

                 CAROL
        But your living room?

                 NIKKI
        I'll Put down visquene.  It's just 
        until I get the carport done.

                 CAROL
        When's that?

                 NIKKI
        I found this contractor who'll do 
        it on the cheap, but he's got to 
        squeeze me in between jobs.

                 CAROL
        Nikki, you do remember when Roger 
        hired that remodel guy to do our 
        bathroom...

                 NIKKI
        So, did you actually file the missing 
        persons report?

                 CAROL
        Exactly!  Fourteen weeks of sponge 
        baths while waiting on a job that 
        was
            (mimics contractor)
        guaranteed done in three weeks, 
        ma'am.

                 NIKKI
        I know.  I know.  But it got done.  

Jilly appears in the hall.  Seems apprehensive.

                 JILLY
        Mommy c'mear.

                 CAROL
        What is it, honey?

                 JILLY
        Mommy, I broke Aunt Nikki's toilet.

                 CAROL
        Let's go look.

A Moment later from down the hall...

                 CAROL (O.S.)
        Nikki, come here.

INT. BATHROOM -- DAY

Water on the floor.  Nikki enters--looks upset. 

                 CAROL
        You got to call a Rooter guy.  Look!  
        It's coming up in the tub.

                 JILLY
        I didn't mean to break it, Aunt 
        Nikki.  I only peed.  Honest.

                 NIKKI
            (hugs her)
        You didn't break it, Sweetie.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

The two women unload the truck.  The old man next 
door watches from a porch swing.  Jilly approaches 
Nikki.

                 JILLY
        Can I go down the sidewalk?

Nikki looks at Carol.  She shrugs why not.

                 NIKKI
        Okay, Sweetie.  Don't go too far.

Jilly skips away.  The two women struggle with a 
sofa.

EXT. NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE. -- DAY

Jilly stops and looks up at the old man in the 
porch swing.

                 JILLY
        You got any kids, mister?

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        Yes, but their all grown up now.

                 JILLY
            (disappointed)
        Oh.

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
            (eying the women)
        Is that your mommy?

                 JILLY
        Uh-huh.

Jilly skips away.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM -- NIGHT

Plastic on the floor, over the sofa, everywhere.  
The butcher block stands in the middle of the room.  
A few blocks of raw stone and the damaged "phallus" 
stone rest near the wall.  Jilly sleeps in a chair.  
Nikki sprawls half asleep on the sofa.  Carol enters 
from the kitchen with a mug of coffee.  She sets 
it down and falls back on the other side of the 
sofa.

                 CAROL
        Ouch!

                 NIKKI
        Watch out for the visquene.

Carol wrestles out a roll of plastic sheeting behind 
her.

                 CAROL
        Thanks...  Whew!  I am totally 
        expunged.

                 NIKKI
        That one of you're new words?

                 CAROL
        Uh-huh.

                 NIKKI
        Carol, trust me.  Lay off the "ex" 
        words.  
            (Carol doesn't get it)
        Stay the night.  Okay?

                 CAROL
        Uhn.  Roger needs Mommy to tuck him 
        in.

                 NIKKI
        Screw Roger.

                 CAROL
        Too tired...  Too sticky.

                 NIKKI
        Seriously, stay.  I'll drive you 
        down to Albany tomorrow so you can 
        catch the train.  That'll be a lot 
        nicer than a stupid bus ride.

                 CAROL
        Okay.  Screw Roger.

                 NIKKI
            (giggles)
        Yeah, screw him.  

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Jilly plays in the driveway.  GRETTA LAWTON, walks 
up.

                 GRETTA
        Little Girl?  Is you mama inside?

                 JILLY
        Shhhh.  She's sleeping.

                 GRETTA
            (seems troubled)
        How old are you, hon?

                 JILLY
        Six.  Five.  I'll be six on my 
        birthday.

                 GRETTA
        And your mama lets you play outside 
        all by yourself?

                 JILLY
        Yeah! 
            (wilting)
        I'm not s'posed to unless she says 
        so, but there's no TV and she's 
        asleep and I looked outside and saw 
        a dog and I wanted to pet it but it 
        was a stupid cat then--You won't 
        tell my mom on me?

                 GRETTA
        No, hon.  Not if you scoot yourself 
        inside.  Okay?  

                 JILLY
        Okay.

                 GRETTA
        I'll come back by in few days...  
        And lock that door.  Okay, hon?

                 JILLY
        Okay.  Thanks for not telling.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- LATER

Carol helps Jilly with her sweater.

                 CAROL
        Go get your Barbie purse, Jill.

                 JILLY
        Oh yeah!  Okay, mom.

                 NIKKI
        She's so cute. 

                 CAROL
        Nikki, I'm going to miss you.

                 NIKKI
        Jeez!  It's only like, seventy miles.

                 CAROL
        It might as well be some weird 
        alternated universe.  You know how 
        Roger gets when I'm away.  I can 
        picture the headlines:  WIFE AWAY 
        FOR ONE DAY, MAN LOSES HIS OWN BUTT.

                 NIKKI
        C'mon, Sis.

                 CAROL
        I know.  I know.  He gets so lonely.  
        It's actually kind of flattering. 

                 JILLY
        Aunt Nikki, I'm going on a train.

                 NIKKI
        I know, Sweetie.
            (to Carol)
        We better go or we'll miss it.

                 JILLY
        Mom, hurry.  We'll miss it.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

They get in the car.  Nikki pulls out of the drive.

EXT. AMTRAK PLATFORM -- DAY

Tearful hugs at the train.  Carol's making too 
much of it.  

                 CONDUCTOR
        Board.

                 JILLY
        Mom, he said it again.

                 CAROL
        You'd think she's never been on a 
        train before... and you'd be right.
            (to Jilly)
        Okay Sweetie, calm down.
            (to Nikki; hugs; kisses)
        I'll call you this afternoon.

                 JILLY
        Mom!  Bye Aunt Nikki.

                 NIKKI
        Bye Sweetie.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Nikki enters the living room and looks over her 
stone collection.  Her eyes fix on the damaged 
phallus-like one.

                 NIKKI
        Why not?

She sets down her coffee and wrestles the stone to 
the butcher block.  She takes out her pencil and 
marks the phallic shape.

                 NIKKI
            (mimics an art teacher)
        Remember class, let the stone suggest 
        it shape to you.  Don't fight it.

With hammer and point, face shield and filter mask, 
TAP TAP TAP, she begins roughing it out.  Suddenly, 
she stops, lifts the face shield.  She eyes the 
wall expecting a BAM.

                 NIKKI
        Ummmmmm.  Good riddance, Ron.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- LATER

A "RABID ROOTER" van is parked in front.  Close 
up, the "B" in RABID is actually a "P" altered 
with spray paint.

On the roof stands the ROOTERMAN with a power tool.  
He grinds away with great difficulty then stops 
and shakes his head.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Nikki answers a knock at the door.

                 ROOTERMAN
        Ma'am, I'm sorry, but your pipes is 
        shot.  Ain't nothing left there to 
        ream.  They got to be dug and put 
        new again out to the cesspool.

                 NIKKI
        Is that a lot?

                 ROOTERMAN
        Yes, ma'am, but if you knows a 
        somebody who can dig 'em, I can 
        show you where.  It ain't hard to 
        fix, but It'll be spendy if'n I do 
        it.

                 NIKKI
        I know someone who can dig.  Show 
        me.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE - BACK YARD -- NIGHT

Nikki has a desk lamp rigged to light the short 
trench she's digging from the back of her house to 
the septic tank.

The light comes on at the back of the nosey 
neighbor's house.  His head pops out of his door 
and cranes.  Funny, from his yard, Nikki's trench 
looks like a grave.

Nikki stoops and picks up a pipe section.  She 
cradles it in both arms as she walks to the trench 
and carefully, lowers the pipe into place being 
carful not to drop or damage it.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

The sound of a toilet flushing.  Nikki appear from 
the bath and walks down the hall zipping up her 
overalls.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE - LIVING ROOM -- DAY

With face shield in place, she chisels away at the 
stone phallus.  It's really taking shape.  She 
lifts the face shield.  She's embarrassed and 
amused.  She strokes it and snickers.

A knock at the door.  Nikki removes the shield and 
answers.

                 GRETTA
        Hi, hon.  I'm Gretta Lawton from 
        Community Welcoming.  I just wanted 
        to drop by and say howdy to a new 
        neighbor.

Gretta stares at Nikki's coveralls.  Nikki suddenly 
becomes self conscious about her appearance and 
her messy house.

                 NIKKI
        That's so nice.  I'm Nikki Black.  
        I'd invite you in, but things are a 
        mess.

                 GRETTA
        Never you mind.  I don't mind the 
        mess a bit, hon.  Movin's a pain.  
        I know!  
            (strains to see inside)
        My husband's a Marine Captain, 
        retired.  He's the sheriff here 
        now.  Lawton the lawman. 

Nikki opens the screen door for her but suddenly 
glances at the phallus.  She jerks her head back 
toward Gretta.

                 NIKKI
        Uh, No!  I'm sorry.  I'm too 
        embarrassed-- the mess.  You 
        understand.

                 GRETTA
        Don't you worry, hon, I sure do.

Gretta noticed Nikki's head snap.  She looks and 
catches a glimpse of the phallus sculpture.  Nikki 
tenses and shifts position to block the view.  
Gretta tries even harder to see it again.  Nikki 
comes outside and pulls the door shut.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

                 NIKKI
        But this is so sweet.  Maybe we 
        could have coffee soon.

                 GRETTA
        I'd like that.
            (pulls a paper from 
            her attaché case)
        Hon, if you don't mind, we ask 
        everyone to fill one of these out.  
        Sometimes if we know a little more 
        about you, we can help you settle 
        in.  It's kind of a neighborly thing 
        the city does.

                 NIKKI
        Sure.  I don't mind.

                 GRETTA
        Great.  Here's an envelope so you 
        don't need a stamp.

                 NIKKI
        Great.

Nikki backs in the door while perusing the form.  
Gretta strains to see the stone phallus as she 
does.

                 NIKKI
        Bye.

Gretta snaps back her rubber neck and smiles.

                 GRETTA
        Later, hon.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

                 NIKKI
        Okay, good neighbor time.
            (sings, smiles)
        Won't you be, my neighbor. 

She writes her name and address on the form, checks 
some boxes and comes to:  CHIDREN:  
____________________(names/ages)

                 NIKKI
        That's easy.  En oh en eeee.

With a flourish she writes: None.  The "e" looks 
like an "I".

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Nikki's at the mailbox posting the form.  The old 
man next door waves.  She waves back.  He looks 
around her yard like he's looking for someone.  
She goes back inside.

INT. OFFICE -- DAY

Hands open a letter.  It's Nikki's welcome form.  
Hands place it in a page holder and type on a 
computer keyboard.  A hand adjusts the line guide 
on the page holder even with the "CHILDREN:" line.  
The hands are Greta Lawton's at the Community 
Welcoming office.

                 GRETTA
        Non?  Oh, Noni!  Like my great 
        granny.

She types in, NAME:  NONI  

                 GRETTA
        Let's see, how old'd that little 
        cutie say she was?

She types in, AGE:  SIX  . 

INT. CAROL'S HOME - PORTLAND -- NIGHT

                 CAROL
            (dials the phone)
        I miss you...  But it's been a whole 
        week.  How much can a sister 
        endear...  Yeah, endure.  I meant 
        that.
            (laughs)
        Are you working?
            (beat; laughs)
        Oh God.  I knew you were going to 
        do that.  So how shlong is it?
            (laughs)
        The noise?  No complaints?  
        Fantastical!  I going to do a drive-
        by mooning at your old neighbor's, 
        Ronnyboy.
            (beat)
        No, mine!  If Roger stuck his out,  
        Ron-Ron'd probably chase after it 
        whining like a bitch in heat.
            (laughs)

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

TAP TAP TAP.  A few final wacks at her stylized 
stone phallus.  She picks up a rasp and begins the 
smoothing.

RING.  The telephone.  Nikki lifts her shield and 
filter mask.  She reaches for the speaker phone 
button.  

                 NIKKI
        Oh, Carol.  Come on now. 
            (pushing the button)
        Hi. 

                 TELEPHONE MESSAGE
            (recorded voice)
        Hello, this is Wilson Elementary 
        School calling to inform you that 
        your child
            (computer generated 
            voice)
        Noni
            (recorded voice)
        is absent without parental excuse 
        for
            (comp-gen voice)
        three days.
            (recorded voice)
        Please call Mrs. Anderson in the 
        office between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m.  
        Thank you.

                 NIKKI
        Huh?

She shrugs it off and returns to her work stroking 
the phallus up and down with the rasp.  She becomes 
uneasy and stops.

                 NIKKI
        This is too weird.

She grabs the statue and places it on the floor 
staring at it a moment.  She leaves the room and 
returns with a black towel.  She covers the phallus.

EXT. NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE - BACK YARD -- DAY

The old man prunes his bushes.  Nikki comes outside 
with a small box of grass seed.  And grabs a rake 
on her way to the filled-in trench.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE - BACK YARD -- DAY

                 NIKKI
            (reads)
        Covers 300 square feet.  Rake in.  
        Water twice a day 'til an inch high.

She sprinkles the seed and rakes.  She gets the 
hose and waters.  She shuts the water off an heads 
for the house.

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        I haven't seen the little girl 
        lately...

The phone rings in Nikki's house.

                 NIKKI
            (distracted, to herself)
        Little girl... Oh!
            (to the neighbor)
        She's gone.  Got to get my phone.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

She grabs the handset and puts it to her ear.

INT. SCHOOL ATTENDANCE OFFICE -- DAY

The lights flash on a telephone messaging machine.

                 TELEPHONE MESSAGE
            (recorded voice)
        Hello, this is Wilson Elementary 
        School calling to inform you that 
        your child
            (comp-gen voice)
        Noni
            (recorded voice)
        is absent without parental excuse 
        for
            (comp-gen voice)
        four days.
            (recorded voice)
        Please call Mrs. Anderson in the 
        office between 8 a.m. and 4 p.m.  
        Thank you.
            (another light flashes; 
            another recorded 
            voice)
        A reply is necessary today to avoid 
        further action being taken.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

She's confused.  She looks up the number and dials.

                 NIKKI
        Mrs. Anderson please...  Oh.  When 
        would be a good time?...  Well, 
        okay.  Tell her that Nikki Black 
        called about the phone messages for 
        some kid called, Noni?  Um, I don't 
        have any kids.
            (smiles, beat)
        Oh, okay, sure, thanks.  I'm sure 
        that will straighten it all out...  
        Okay.  Thanks.  Bye.

She's happy.  All is well.  She looks out the back 
window.  The neighbor man is ogling the sewer repair 
in her yard.  She walks to the door, but the 
neighbor is already walking away.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Nikki circles a new stone sandbagged on the butcher 
block.  She stands and squats as she reconnoiters 
it occasionally making a grease pencil mark.  --
RING.  The phone.

                 NIKKI
            (hits the speaker 
            button)
        Hi, this is Nikki. 

                 TELEPHONE MESSAGE
            (recorded voice)
        Hello, this is Wilson Elementary 
        School calling to inform you that 
        your child
            (comp-gen voice)
        Noni
            (recorded voice)
        is absent without parental excuse 
        for
            (comp-gen voice)
        five days.

     NIKKI
This is crazy.  I'm going 
to fix this mess.

                            TELEPHONE MESSAGE
                        Please call Mrs. Anderson 
                        in the office between

She grabs her bag and storms out the door without 
hanging up. 

                 TELEPHONE MESSAGE
        8 a.m. and 4 p.m.  Thank you...
            (beat; a different 
            recorded voice)
        Because you have not previously 
        responded, County Social Services 
        has been informed of this situation.  
        We regret any inconveniences that 
        may result.

INT. WILSON ELEMENTARY SCHOOL - ATTENDANCE OFFICE -- 
DAY

Nikki sits at a desk talking with MRS. ANDERSON, a 
warm pleasant woman.

                 MRS. ANDERSON
        You see, we're all on the same 
        mainframe to save costs.  The city 
        offices, the police, the local school 
        district, we all have local work 
        stations networked with the same 
        computer.  Anyway, someone somewhere 
        along the way entered some data on 
        you and made you a mother.
            (pages the screens)
        Here it is.  Dependent children: 
        Noni, age six.  Very specific.
            (she highlights it)
        All I have to do is hit delete.  
        You sure you don't want to be a 
        mother?

Nikki gives her a look.  She hits DELETE.

                 MRS. ANDERSON
        As though it were never there...

                 NIKKI
        You sure?

                 MRS. ANDERSON
        You're completely out of the school 
        district files.

                 NIKKI
        Hmm, that was easy.  Thank you so 
        much.

                 MRS. ANDERSON
        Your welcome.  Drop by again.  Maybe 
        you'd like to give a talk to the 
        children on sculpting.

                 NIKKI
        I'd like that.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

A man and a woman, PETE and LINDA, are at the door 
as Nikki pulls in the drive.  She parks and goes 
to meet them.

                 NIKKI
        Can I help you?

                 LINDA
        I'm Linda Rancor and this is my 
        assistant Pete Short.  Are you Nikki 
        Black?

                 NIKKI
        Yes. 

                 LINDA
        Ma'am, we're from Social Services 
        Child Welfare Division, and we need 
        to speak with you about your daughter 
        Noni.

                 NIKKI
        This is too much!  I've already 
        wasted my whole morning on this 
        nonsense.  There is no Noni.  Go 
        talk with Mrs. Anderson at Wilson 
        and straighten it out with her.

She blows by them and jams her key in the door.

                 LINDA
        Ma'am, we will not tolerate that 
        tone.  I don't think you understand--

                 NIKKI
        --YOU don't understand.  Noni is a 
        blip.  A computer error.  Persona 
        non, uh, nonexistent.  Now quit 
        bothering me and talk with Mrs. 
        Anderson at the school.  It's all 
        fixed. 

She goes in and slams the door.

EXT. CITY STREETS -- LATER

GEORGE LAWTON, the genial sheriff, drives.  He 
munches on a celery stick and fumbles with a file 
folder.  It's amazing that he doesn't run into 
something.  He turns down Nikki's street and parks 
behind the social workers' car.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

They greet each other and talk as they walk to 
Nikki's door.  The Sheriff knocks.  Nikki answers.  
The social workers stand behind the Sheriff.

                 SHERIFF
        Missus Black?

                 NIKKI
        Oh, shit!  Uh, no.  I'm not married.  
        It's Miss Black--Nikki.  Look, I'm 
        sorry.  I over-reacted.  It's just 
        that this has all been unnerving.

                 SHERIFF
        That's okay, ma'am.  My wife said 
        you seemed a reasonable person.  
        You met her.  Gretta Lawton?

                 NIKKI
        Oh, you're Lawton the lawman.

                 SHERIFF
        Yes, ma'am.  I'm just here to 
        facilitate.  May we come inside?

                 NIKKI
        Honestly, I'd rather you didn't.  
        It's kind of a mess.

                 SHERIFF
        Yes, ma'am, but please.  Out here 
        isn't a proper setting.

                 NIKKI
        Well, okay.

                 SHERIFF
            (motions the case 
            workers inside)
        Please.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

As the social workers enter they disapprovingly 
look around at the plastic lined room.  Dust  and 
rock chips everywhere.  The new sculpture stone 
rests on the butcher block.

                 SHERIFF
        Sculptor?
            (Nikki smiles)
        My nephew's a--well, no.  Not like 
        this.  He puts the names on 
        headstones.  
            (all move to the 
            kitchen)
        Ladies... Gentleman... Work this 
        out! 

Nikki takes a dish cloth and wipes the table and 
chairs.

                 NIKKI
        Please, sit.

The social workers sit with Nikki.  The Sheriff 
moves back and examines the living room/sculpting 
studio. 

                 PETE
        Missus Black--

                 NIKKI
        Miss Black.

                 PETE
        Uhn.  It is our job to intervene 
        when the welfare of children is at 
        stake.

                 NIKKI
        But there are no--

                 LINDA
        --AND, as district supervisor, it 
        is up to me and my staff to make a 
        determination as to what is in the 
        best interest of the child.

                 NIKKI
        But--

                 LINDA
        Let me finish!  When we receive a 
        call, we make a personal visit to 
        the home environment to make an 
        assessment, and I must tell you, 
        looking over your surroundings, 
        that this mess, is not conducive to 
        a child's well being.

The sheriff raises the black towel covering the 
phallus sculpture and is startled by the monolith.

                 SHERIFF
        Whoa!

                 LINDA
            (turns to see)
        All right.  What's going on here?
            (to Pete)
        This could be cult thing.  Satanic.

                 PETE
            (eyes glued to the 
            phallus)
        Jeez, that's a big one. 

                 NIKKI
        It's a sculpture.  I'm an artist.

                 LINDA
        Quiet.  That's not art.  I know 
        what art is.  Where's Noni?  Where's 
        the little girl? 

                 NIKKI
        There is no--

                 LINDA
        Stop lying to us.

Nikki bangs her fist on the table.

                 NIKKI
        You stop and listen.  Will you?  
        Please.  There is no child.  Hello?  
        I do not have any children.

                 LINDA
        That, is not true.  Our computer 
        records specifically state one child: 
        female, name: Noni, age: six, Missus 
        Black.

                 NIKKI
        It's MISS Black, and I don't care 
        what your computer says.  I don't 
        have a kid.  I don't even have a 
        stretch mark.

                 LINDA
        Who in the hell do you think--

                 SHERIFF
        Calm down, everyone.

He drops the towel on the phallus.  Pete finally 
quits staring.

                 LINDA
        Sheriff!  She can't--

                 SHERIFF
        Stop!  Miss Black, Nikki, My wife 
        told me that a couple days before 
        she met with you, she came by your 
        house and talked with a little girl 
        playing in the drive.  The child 
        said her mother was inside this 
        house asleep.

                 NIKKI
        What?... Oh, oh, oh.  That was my 
        niece.  My sister, her mom, helped 
        me move...  I took them to the train.  
        Must have been the same day.

                 SHERIFF
        Uh-huh.  Okay.  Miss Black, we don't 
        have rail service in Harmony.

                 NIKKI
        Not here, for Christ's sake!  We 
        went to Albany to catch the damn 
        train.

                 SHERIFF
        Okay.  Calm down.  
            (beat)
        Miss Rancor, Mister Short.  Let's 
        give Miss Black some space while I 
        check into this.

                 LINDA
        I cannot leave the little girl in 
        this environment.

                 SHERIFF
        Miss Rancor, she says there is no 
        child here.  Now let's leave her 
        alone until I check things out.

                 LINDA
        But--

                 SHERIFF
        No but.

They get up and walk out the door.  The sheriff 
lingers behind.

                 SHERIFF
        Miss Black?

                 NIKKI
        Yes?

                 SHERIFF
        That train.  What time was that?

                 NIKKI
        About eleven.  It was a little late.

                 SHERIFF
        Thank you.  I'm sure we'll get this 
        all taken care of for you.

                 NIKKI
        I hope so.

                 SHERIFF
        Miss Black?  That statue?  My wife 
        says you had that on kind of an 
        alter?

                 NIKKI
        My God, NO!  It was on my work table.  
        I was shaping it.  Jeez!  It was 
        lark.  I don't do that sort of work 
        normally.

                 SHERIFF
        Uh-huh.

                 NIKKI
        I don't!  It's a joke.

                 SHERIFF
        Yes ma'am.

The sheriff exits.  Nikki shivers.  She calms 
herself.

                 NIKKI
        Good!

She stomps through the room and grabs her coveralls. 

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

The Social Workers get in their car.

                 SHERIFF
        Just be patient.  I'll be in touch 
        in a day or two.

                 LINDA
        I'm going to speak with my supervisor 
        about your action in this 
        investigation.

                 SHERIFF
        You do what you have to, but I'm in 
        authority here until I hear 
        different.

They pull away.  Lawton walks to his patrol car.  
The old man from next door jogs over to him.

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        George?  Could I have a word with 
        you?

                 SHERIFF
        Sure thing, Ev. 

The two men talk.  Lawton looks concerned and ogles 
the house.

INT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- LATER

TAP TAP.  Nikki works on her new sculpture.  TAP 
TAP TAP.  She walks around the work tapping at the 
top removing material.  She takes extra time to 
line up the chisel when she reaches a critical cut 
to remove the center chunk.  

She takes a breath, draws the hammer back, and 
swings.

VAROOOOOM!  BEEP BEEP BEEP.  Heavy machinery roars 
outside.  SLAM!  The hammer contacts the chisel at 
the wrong angle.  CRASH!  The stone splits in two 
and THUD.  Both halves fall from the work table.  
Her hand is again nicked.

                 NIKKI
        Damn, damn, DAMN!  Not again!

She drops the chisel and shakes her throbbing hand.  

Suddenly, red and blue lights flash across the 
pulled curtains.  The incessant beeping and engine 
gunning grows louder yet.  Nikki flips up her face 
shield and storms to the front door.

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- DAY

Nikki yanks the door, kicks open the screen, and 
storms out towards a deputy standing next to a 
roaring backhoe.  VARROOOM!  She is beyond pissed 
and still clutches her two pound hammer as she 
menaces towards Bobby, the DEPUTY.

                 NIKKI
        What in the God damn HELL do you 
        think you're doing?

The deputy panics when he sees the hammer in her 
hand.  He jostles his pistol from its holster as 
Nikki stomps closer.

                 DEPUTY
        You, stop!  Put your hands up.

Nikki's momentum carries her forward.  She see the 
gun rising towards her.  Fear!  She tries to stop 
as she raises her hands unconscious of the hammer 
she still grasps.  Bobby's eye bug.  The sheriff 
sees what's about to happen.

                 SHERIFF
        Bobby no!  NO!

The deputy looks at the sheriff.  

BANG!  His gun accidentally discharges.  Everything 
stops.  The Deputy looks cross-eyed at the swirl 
of smoke rising from his gun barrel and for a long, 
scarey moment, everyone is frozen--Nikki with her 
hands raised part way.  

There's a smoking hole in the hammer's handle.  
The hammer head topples like a falling tree and 
THUDs on the ground.

                 SHERIFF
            (stomping toward Nikki)
        That's it!
            (passing the Deputy)
        You're damned lucky, Bobby.

The sheriff goes to Nikki and cuffs her.  She's 
still in shock. 

                 SHERIFF
        Miss Black,   I wish you hadn't 
        charged out like that.

                 NIKKI
        Why are you doing this to me?

The Sheriff pulls out a paper and shows it to her.

                 SHERIFF
        Ma'am, this is a search warrant.  
        We got a report about a grave being 
        dug.

                 NIKKI
        Grave?!  I dug my pipes.  I was 
        fixing my pipes.

                 SHERIFF
        Pipes?  Uh, yes, ma'am.  That's 
        what we're here to determine. 

EXT. NIKKI'S HOUSE -- LATER - NIGHT

The place is a disaster.  Searchlights everywhere.  
The backhoe has cratered both the front and back 
yards. 

People are all around.  It's like a circus.  Gretta 
Lawton and the nosey neighbor are talking.

Nikki and the sheriff sit in his car.

VARROOM.  The backhoe takes another gouge out of 
the lawn as Nikki stares out in disbelief.  She 
bangs her head against the car window in 
frustration.

Things are wrapping up.  The backhoe operator 
empties the scoop.

                 BACKHOE OPERATOR
        Ain't nothing here, Bobby.

                 DEPUTY
        You positive.

The place looks like the moon.

                 BACKHOE OPERATOR
        Bobby?

                 DEPUTY
        What?

                 BACKHOE OPERATOR
            (motions to the craters)
        Duh!

Bobby sneers and waves the sheriff over.

The sheriff opens the car door and helps Nikki to 
her feet.  He leads her over near the Deputy and 
the backhoe operator. 

                 DEPUTY
        Okay, boss, here's how I see the 
        situation...

The backhoe operator sneers as Bobby takes over 
and tweaks the shovel blade.  It nudges the deputy.  
He almost falls.  The deputy shoots the operator a 
look.

                 DEPUTY
            (clears his throat)
        Here's how I see it.  She's clean.

                 SHERIFF
        What?!

                 DEPUTY
        She's clean, Boss.  The only bodies 
        'round here is the earthworms.

The Sheriff considers this then looks around the 
crowd.  He glares at the nosey neighbor and 
shouts... 

                 SHERIFF
        Ev!  Get over here.

The nosey neighbor and Gretta come over.  Nikki 
looks up with sad plaintive eyes and then looks 
down.  Gretta grimaces.

Another car pulls up and double parks in the street.

                 SHERIFF
            (to the neighbor)
        Ev, you said you saw her bury a 
        body.

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        She dug a hole and went next to the 
        house.  I saw her heft it up.  She 
        had to use both arms.  Then she 
        lowered that poor innocent babe 
        into that pit.

                 NIKKI
            (outraged)
        It was a pipe, you moron.  I just 
        wanted to flush my toilet.

Carol emerges from the double-parked car and stares 
at the scene dumbfoundedly.  Jilly comes out behind 
her and latches onto her leg.  Stunned, they walk 
toward the Sheriff and Nikki.

                 SHERIFF
        Ev?  Was it a pipe?

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        I saw what I saw, and I haven't 
        seen that little girl since.

                 SHERIFF
        Did you have your glasses?

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        I saw what I saw. 

Carol and Jilly approach.  She looks over at Nikki.

                 CAROL
        Nikki?

Before Nikki can answer, Gretta screams.

                 GRETTA
        AAAUUUGGHH!  That's her!  That's 
        the little girl!

The neighbor sees her too as Jilly scoots behind 
her mother.

                 NEIGHBOR MAN
        It's, but, but, but, but...

                 SHERIFF
        Ev, shut your fool mouth.  You sound 
        like a motor boat.

                 JILLY
        Did I do something bad, Mommy?

EXT. EFFICIENCY APARTMENT - PORTLAND WATERFRONT -- 
DAY

The finished and polished stone phallus sits 
predominantly on the railing of the terrace 
glistening in the sunlight like a beacon, making a 
visual statement for all to see.

Nikki, looking recovered, lounges on a chaise in 
the shadow of the sculpture.  She sips coffee from 
a Starbuck's mug.

INT. EFFICIENCY APT - PORTLAND WATERFRONT -- DAY

Everything is settled.  Her belongings in place.  
It's obvious she's been here for a while. 

RING.  The telephone.  She enters and answers.

                 NIKKI
        Hi... Oh hi, Carol!

INT. CAROL'S HOME - PORTLAND -- DAY

                 CAROL
        How does it feel now that you're 
        settled again--A regular denizen of 
        Metropolis, so to speak.
            (beat)
        No.  This time I know it's right.  
        You look it up!  
            (beat)
        Want to get some lunch?  Just a 
        couple of hot babes out at a trendy 
        eatery... Fantastical!  I'll come 
        pick you up.

INT. EFFICIENCY APT - PORTLAND WATERFRONT -- DAY

Nikki pushes the back on her earring and spritzes 
herself with perfume.  She straightens her outfit.  
Seems relaxed.

BUZZ.  The doorbell.

                 NIKKI
        Coming Care.

She opens the door.  A man and a woman are there.

                 NIKKI
        Yes?

                 MAN
        Nikki Black?

                 NIKKI
        Yes?

                 MAN
        We're from the Department of Human 
        Services, Child Protective Agency.
            (they both flash I.D.'s)
        A distressing memo came through the 
        inter-county computer network, and 
        ma'am, we need to see your daughter 
        Noni, right now.

                                         FADE OUT:
                                        

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